It happened again. I sent my Hubstopher to the shops to buy something girly for me and, upon return, he handed me the cashier’s receipt expecting a reimbursement. I looked at him, slip in hand, with shock and betrayal written all over my face, like, hello, we are husband and wife! I can’t owe you money!

What utter nonsense is this?! But nope, homeboy was having none of it. He had spent his hard earned dollar bill on my girly things and he wanted his cash back (to spend on his manly things, I’m assuming).

I straight out refused to reimburse him, you guys. Because, you know, husbands and wives can’t owe each other money. Right? Isn’t that, like, the rule of LIFE? Doesn’t it say that in the Bible somewhere? Can someone find the scripture for me? I need to prove a point.

Anyways.

When I brought up the topic with a few close friends of mine they just laughed and laughed and laughed. I mean, I totally thought their manic laughter was in support of me. But nay, they were laughing AT me. Because apparently husbands and wives CAN owe each other money. And “community of property” has nothing to do with it.

“It’s a principal thing, Luchae” one of them explained, as she wiped tears from her eyes.

Apparently my way of thinking is totally old school. And since we’re living in the modern day era (you know, where we don’t have to wipe our bums with banana leaves or grow our own potatoes) men and women now earn their wages fair and square.

And since the earning of wages is fair and square and all of that, more households are co-dependent on BOTH man and woman’s salaries. We both earn and we both contribute towards the household.

And if I’m willing to split household expenses with the guy, then I should atleast acknowledge that we’ve come to an unspoken agreement that his money is his and mine is mine and together we make things work for our home? Right?

Well I have questions about that.

I mean, what happens when husband and wife has a joint account or has come to an agreement that “it’s OUR money, and not yours or mine”… do you then ask for permission every time you want to make a girly purchase? Also, is it very sexist of me to expect the man to foot the bill for everything? Am I just old school like that?

And so, while debating the topic in my head (hands up if you have long debates with yourself) I came to the conclusion that I probably should #paybackthemoney. Because, in all fairness, when I sent him to the shops, I didn’t let him know that he’d be spending his hard earned cash on my hair products.

I mean, regardless of how important a leave in conditioner is when you’re living on this side of South Africa, I guess it’s not something that my husband would be budgeting for, at the end of each month. I guess it’s something that I should be budgeting for. And thus said, something that I should be paying for. I guess. Sigh.

My inner old-school lass needs to realize that I need to be a little bit more conscientious and inclusive when I make decisions about spending money… especially when it affects my husband. Although, I’m not gonna lie to you,  when he came at me with a receipt, my inner Jane Austen was like, “Kind Sir! I find this most insulting that I, a fair Lady, should reimburse thy spend! Begone with thee, foul man!”

Well, something like that.

Anyways, I thought to take it to the streets (this is the streets, you guys, my blog is so hip) and find out what you guys would do in a situation like this. Do you reimburse your hubby if he went to the shops to buy something for you? Do you expect reimbursement? Is it a matter of whose salary is the highest? Lend me your thoughts in the comments section below!

(Images: Header – Freepik; Body – Donna van der Watt)

According to my lady friends, if this were a wildlife program, and I had to point you guys in the direction of a husband “in his natural environment”, I might just be showing you the way to the loo.

My conspiracy theory is that they use the confines of the lavatory to, you know, hide away from their families. Or perhaps there is a portal in there? One that helps them to escape into the magical world of unlimited sport, gaming videos and other such marital witchcraft. Who knows. 

But it got me thinking about this strange phenomena called “husband” and all the random things he does that I just don’t understand! You know, things like:

1. He can never find anything! I mean, even if it’s right there, on the 2nd shelf, where I had told him to look. He can’t find it. I call it “marital blinkers” and I’m convinced a set of these automatically grows onto husband’s face, as soon as he says “I do.” He can also never remember where we keep anything… the paper towels, the kids swimming clothes, the light bulbs. It’s the same place we’ve kept them for five years. But he never remembers.

2. His kiddies fashion style is putrid. Asking your husband to dress the kids, without – gasp! – actually laying the clothes out before the time, is a bit like playing fashion Russian Roulette. You never know what you’re going to end up with. My husband once brought Kyle to my work and the kid was wearing a shocking yellow t-shirt, a shocking pink shorts and shocking blue sneakers. I was almost blinded. Husbands and kids fashion is not a good mix, you guys.

3. He is able to slip into his “nothing box” in an instant and he won’t even admit that he was there. You know what the nothing box is, right? It’s that mental space that husband’s venture into, where they don’t hear a word you’re saying. Sometimes they slip into this box, while staring at the TV screen. Other times they actually fall asleep in mid-sentence, while you’re having a deep convo, because the allure of the nothing box is that strong. And when you accuse them of not paying attention, their response is: “I AM listening!”

4. He has this weird inability to multitask that grates my nerves like nobodies business, you guys! Like, he can’t bath the kids and consciously make an effort to keep the bathroom tidy, while doing so. Making a sandwich and then packing all the sandwich-making goodies away as he is doing it, is an impossible suggestion! Nope, he needs to make the sandwich. Eat the sandwich. Then clean up an hour later. Him: chilling. Me: Losing my mind.

5. When he’s sick, nothing else matters in the whole world, except for the fact that he is sick. The man-flu is a real thing. Quite frankly, ladies, I don’t know how we survive it! I don’t know about yours, but when my husband is sick, he literally lays in bed and moans, like a dying person. He pretty much expects me to wipe his forehead with a damp cloth, while feeding him chicken soup.

Truth be told, you guys, the list of things that I love about this man far outweighs the list of things that annoy me. They say men are from Mars and women are from Venus, which is just a clever way to remind us that, yep, we ARE different. But our quirky little differences is what makes our marriage interesting. Right?

Can you relate to any of this? What are some of the strange/annoying things that your husband does?