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My toddler is dramatic and it’s NOT my fault
My two year old brings the drama. Yes, my toddler is dramatic… there, I said it. Oh wait, you think I’m exaggerating. Let me put it to you this way: On a scale of one to Beyonce, she totally ranks when it comes to being over the top. And the thing is, Hubstopher and I are many things, but over the top dramatic is not one of them. (I’m serious guys… no, I mean, in real life, I’m a serious person) So I have no idea where this flair for dramatic expression comes from. Anyone else feel me? Do you have a dramatic, over the top, toddler and you have NO idea how they got that way?
Well, I don’t know about your kid, but mine can give you a stinky side eye, so stinky, that it burns. It’s a look that says “How DARE you!” and I promise she did not learn it from us. She is also quite well versed in being able to tell you that you’re wrong or that you need to leave her alone. Full sentences. Sparing no feeling. (Just ask Kyle who is met with “Go away NOW, Kyle!” when he so much as looks at her). My toddler is the drama in dramatic. But whose fault is it anyways?
I’ve always reiterated that my child is not in her “terrible” twos. She is a terrific two year old! (Speak life, and all of that) And I certainly don’t think that there is anything wrong with her or my parenting skills. Sure, Hubstopher and I do give each other “did you see what she just did” looks and stifle our giggles behind stern expressions. But we definitely do not encourage her to demand her way or our attention. So I did some research (because I have a spreadsheet brain, okay) and learnt that toddies still have a lot of cognitive development to, uhh, develop. They experience things with their whole being (that’s why little things are such a big deal to them). And even more so if the kid has a higher sense of maturity or awareness.Kari is exceptionally clever (I’m really not just saying so out of bias) so she is aware when you’re trying to con her into something or if you’re duping her to get something done. I’ve found that sitting down to explain things to her helps so much more than a simple “no girl, sit girl, lay girl, ata girl.” She wants to know the why’s and the why nots. With that said, she may not always understand the why’s and why nots. Sometimes I need to have a very elaborate back story to help her get it. “You need to brush your teeth so that the goggo’s don’t move in! Let me check and see… ahh okay no goggo’s yet… let’s brush quickly!”
Toddlers are frustrated when they cannot express how they feel or properly communicate their wants or needs. They are also not that skilled in switching from one activity to another yet. (Which explains why they may not do what you need them to do immediately or without fuss). They have no concept of time. They have no control of their emotions. Heck, most of them can’t even poop in a “big people” toilet yet.
In a nutshell, they are just tiny humans who are still busy growing! And that’s nobody’s fault. In fact, it’s a good thing, yo. Nope, they are not misbehaving or acting out. And nope they do not need to be punished or taught a lesson. What they need is to GROW and to be steered in the right direction (with patience and love) while doing so. And that’s a fact. So the next time you’re faced with an Oscar-winning performance, grab your toddler, give ’em a big hug and remind yourself that this too shall pass.
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Why being a mother sucks sometimes
Being a mother sucks. What? You don’t agree? Wait, maybe I wasn’t being clear: You know all the amazing parts of being someones mom? Stuff like hearing them call you “mama” for the first time and being able to snuggle up next to them as you read Good night, Mouse for the umpteenth time? Well, those things seem extremely over-rated when you’re exhausted after having to change your bedding (thanks to a massive squirt of newborn poop) and then have to referee an argument between a 2-year old and a 15-year old about who gets to sit on the “big couch”. Oh, hi there, excuse me where are my manners. My name is Luchae Williams and I am the proud
ownermother of one newborn, one toddler, step-mom to one primary schooler and mom to one extremely opinionated highschooler. Mental status: Currently losing my mind.I know, I know, I can hear what you’re thinking. And allow me to reiterate: I DO love my children and I am aware that there are hundreds of women who would give actual limbs to be in my position. But hey, sometimes being mom means keeping it real. And the reality is that my kids drive me crazy! Like “Gone Girl” crazy. Like shaving my hair off ala Britney Spears crazy.
Do your kids make you want to go to the toilet to just sit there, and enjoy the silence? Welcome, friend! Do you often find yourself thinking “oh, just go away!” with a smile on your face, while listening to another boring story about soccer? I see you, girlfriend! Have you ever dreamt about your life pre-children, with stars in your eyes and longing in your heart? I feel your pain, Jane! Does feeling this way make us bad people? Uhhh, nope. It’s okay to not be okay sometimes. Being a parent is not easy and if you think about it, no one asked us to be superhuman. Why do we put so much pressure on ourselves?
You know the saying about kids being your heart on the outside of your body? Well that’s the truest thing I’ve ever heard in my life. And I’m old… so I’ve heard a lot of things in my life. The thing is, children trick you. They make you believe that you’re going to fall pregnant, or find that perfect adoption agency, or marry that guy, and suddenly be Super Parent… in a land filled with domesticated sunshine and roses and finger painting parties in the backyard. You chat about a future that holds sleepless nights, more expenses and less time for yourself and you actually think that you’re READY for it. But truth be told, you’re never really ready.And once that kid is there, in your world, in living color. Oh boy! There is no. turning. back. You are in it for life! Nothing else will be more important ever again. You find yourself semi-moaning (okay in this case alot-of-moaning) about how your kids tire you out and steal your time but the truth is, you don’t want and can’t see a life without them. And no amount of sleep or glitzy career moves or toned abdominal muscles will EVER come close to the way you feel when they call you mama for the first time or when you’re snuggled up reading Good night, Mouse for the umpteenth time.
You become vulnerable… all your mushy parts exposed… living life with your heart on the outside of your body, in tiny human form. And if you’re a spreadsheet brain like I am, you’ll probably think that being a mom sucks too because it feels SO good to belong to them… to be so weak and yet so strong. It’s beautiful and scary and empowering and so very humbling all at the same time.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that it’s worth it.
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Bath time with Oh So Heavenly
I’ll admit I’ve been feeling super guilty lately. My toddler is a mere 2 years (and a couple of months) old and soon, she’ll be relinquishing her title as “baby of the house”. Sob! My little pink curly girly will be a big sister curly girly! How could I do that to her?! Okay, okay, I’m calming myself down. I know that it’s probably just the preggy hormones. I’ve been finding different ways to emotionally and mentally prepare the both of us for the new addition to our space. I try to spend a lot of time with her and instigate conversations around baby Jo and what life will be like once he is here. This weekend we did a girls pamper, thanks to Oh So Heavenly, and we had a few random pamper day conversations (I mean, are toddler convos anything BUT random?) and here’s what went down: -
Tricks for curly chicks: DIY twist out curls
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I love curls! And I love that my one and only daughter has a mop full of locks that puts my “sleek” hair to shame. In my previous ‘tricks for curly chicks‘ posts, I spoke about various ways to maintain that curl. But this time around, I want to show you guys how to do super easy twist out curls, using my current, favorite curly girl product: Aunt Jackie’s. Let’s just say Aunt Jackie’s is to curly chicks what GHD is to straight haired chicks: The bomb dot com!
(BTW this is not a sponsored post, I just really love the stuff!) Even with my limited knowledge of curly hair, I knew that I didn’t want my kid to end up looking like the electrocuted version of Tina Turner. Fortunately, my very own curly hair guru, JustEllaBella, saw my pain and introduced me to this wonder product. Auntie Jackie’s makes hair care for little girls so easy! It is sulfate-free, paraben-free and has no mineral oil or petrolatum additives. I mean, you could drink the stuff. Well, not really. Please don’t drink it. But it IS super loving towards your hair.
I started off by giving her mane a good wash using Aunt Jackie’s Girls ‘Heads Up’ moisturising and softening shampoo. It makes a good amount of foam and smells delish. Oh and most importantly: It doesn’t strip hair of its natural oils yet still gives it a thorough cleanse. Rinse and repeat, and we were good to go!
Next, I applied a few dollops of the amazing Aunt Jackie’s ‘Baby Girl Curls’ curling and twisting custard. The thick, creamy formula is enriched with coconut oil, shea butter and extra virgin olive oil. It’s designed to combat that frizz and help give your curls definition. Totally legit! I applied and combed it through her hair.
The next step takes a bit of patience (from her side and mine). I popped on some Mickey Mouse (on the TV, not on her hair) and started twisting out strands of her hair. Depending on how full you want the hair to be, you could make the twists thicker or thinner.Once that’s done (it really doesn’t take that long), I simply dry her hair on low heat. As you can see (above) my girl was not keen that I was messing with her Mickey Mouse time. But she soon got over it when she took a glimpse in the mirror! She loves her twist outs! They eventually “untwist”, but that’s okay, because the curl has been formed and the product helps to keep it defined.
So, friends, what do you think? Would you give my Aunt Jackie (she’s not really my aunt… or a real person) a try? What is your curly hair regime?Clip note: Moms, I get mine at Clicks! They usually have sweeet 3 for 2 deals, every now and then. So that’s a great time to stock up! The range has a variety of different products, like hair oil and conditioners. But I’ll chat more about those later on.
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Uncle Jumbos Christmas Party brings the festivities!
Every year Nelson Mandela Bay kiddies (and their parents) gear up for Uncle Jumbos Christmas Party – a fun filled evening of make believe and Christmas activities. This year our curly girl visited Uncle Jumbo and his friends for the very first time and she had so much fun! -
The many emotions of a toddler
When it comes to raising a toddler, I refuse to accept the term ‘terrible twos’. I believe that when my toddler turns 2 years old next week, she will begin her season of ‘terrific twos’. Why speak “terribleness” over your child’s life, anyways? No sir, no thank you. I mean, parenting is challenging enough as it is!But with that said, I sometimes sit and stare at my kid as she goes from being ecstatically happy to mournfully sad in a matter of seconds. How is it, little girl, that you loved chicken so much 5 minutes ago, but now you simply cannot have it near you? Did I miss something? One minute she loves her dad and croons “Hallo dada!” beautifully as she plants a fat kiss on his lips. And the next, she yells “NO!” at the top of her voice, when he attempts to pick her up. Split seconds, I tell ya. Is it normal? Yes, yes it is.
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More tricks for curly chicks
I’m a fan of curls, even though I’m not exactly living on the curly side of life. My baby girl, however, has hair that makes random people in shopping malls think that it’s okay to touch it. Bless them. But anyways, so yes, on a good day, she has a major curly afro going on and I love it!
If you recall, I previously posted about the (extremely loose) hair regime that I have going on for Kari. I also try to use natural products on her hair to maintain it’s natural curl. I was advised to try out the Johnson&Johnson curly hair brand but it just dried her hair out. In fact, most baby shampoos did that. I blame the “no tears” chemicals, but what do I know. So yes, we needed something more.
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Things to do in Port Elizabeth (with your toddler) this Summer!
Christmas and the school holidays are just around the corner and boy am I excited! Our girl is 2 years old this year and we are finally able to explore PE and have some toddler fun with her! Fun with a toddler? Yep, it can happen! You need to believe me. Okay, okay, I know you want proof. Fine, let me give you a few examples: -
Win tickets to the Clicks Baby Bootcamp!
Yo, PE Moms! I come with glad tidings of great joy: The Clicks Baby Bootcamp is coming to a town near you!Be honest, do you sometimes feel out of your element when it comes to making decisions wrt baby’s health and wellness? Well, I do. I must admit, I was under the impression that teething and breastfeeding were probably the most complicated parts of mothering a kid. Ha! That’s hilarious, right? I mean, from vaccines to diet (not the lose weight kind… the eat well kind) to what type of infections to look out for, there’s alot of questions that I need answering.
It is with this in mind that I ‘woohoo’d really loudly when I found out that Clicks and Babyline are hosting a series of workshops nationwide, aimed at expectant and new parents. The Baby Bootcamp seeks to provide expert advice, baby related information and demonstrations to these parents.
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Are your kids losers? {Stick2Me can help!}
My kids are amazing, but let’s face it, they are losers. They lose things ALL the time.Are your kids like mine? Maybe your kids are supernaturally gifted in the “coming home with both socks on” department. Maybe you’ve never had to crawl through a sea of tiny shoes, at a kiddies party, only to come up gasping for air, yelling “Has anyone seen a Ben 10 sneaker?!” Maybe your life is different. But I’m guessing that it’s not because, let’s face it, kids are kids and they lose things.
