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Dear husband, you’re not doing a good job…
Dear husband, you’re not doing a good job right now. I mean, not that I would ever tell you. And why should I? You should just know these things.
Things like knowing that: If I reply to your message with ‘K’ then I’m probably NOT “okay”. And my clipped, “whatever” and “do it if you want”, probably means I DON’T want you to do it. But you should easily pick that up. I mean, you should just know.
You should also know that when you sit in front of your computer for hours (the fact that it’s work related is not the point here, husband), my
deathintense stares probably mean that I need a little bit of attention. Yes, years later and I still get needy sometimes. Not that I would tell you.In fact, I shouldn’t HAVE to tell you that I dislike it when you get more excited about soccer than my latest work/friend/child-related saga update. I should be the only excitement in your life. And seriously, I don’t have to tell you that when I reference a giant, pink, cupcake on social media, it probably means that you need to show me your undying devotion by finding me said giant cupcake. (It has to be pink too.) I mean, why should I tell you. You should just know.
Husband, if you were doing a good job, then why didn’t you notice my freshly styled hair last week? Okay, I admit it’s still the same length. And still the same color. But it was “freshly styled” and you didn’t notice. Not doing a good job at all. If you were doing a good job you would’ve complimented me on the exquisite way I did my eye make up on Sunday. It looked SO good. I know this because Estelle, at church, noticed. But you didn’t. And no, I didn’t think to mention it to you because you should just know. Why should I tell you?
If you were doing a good job you would’ve stepped out of your mythical “nothing box” (which I don’t understand or believe in) and picked up that I wanted a foot rub, the other day, when I took my shoes off and sighed really loudly. Or that I needed you to rub my back when I walked into the kitchen semi-groaning, holding on to my fragile parts. I didn’t tell you because I figured that you should just know!
I mean, husband, if you were so amazing at being a husband, you would’ve known that I expected you to hold my hand the other morning when that old love jam played on the radio. Sure, I could have held yours… but, honestly, I expected you to make the first move. You should just know, duh. Just like you should have picked up that I wanted to watch a romantic movie, last Friday, when the kids went to bed early. But I would never, ever tell you that. Why should I?
In fact, why do I need to tell you anything at all? Husbands should just know. I’m not saying read my mind. But you’re my husband now so that means that you basically have to. Doesn’t it come with the package? So something’s not right here. I know I’m being rational. So it’s probably you. Not that I would tell you. You should just know.
Disclaimer: My hubstopher isn’t really all that bad, but yes, I’ll admit that I can be a bit loony toons on occasion. (The hormones, blame the hormones). Wife, girlfriend, do you get this way sometimes? I think that we are all faced with various levels of challenges when it comes to communication. Yes, even you Super Wife, shaking your head at me. I often have to remind myself to SAY SOMETHING instead of expecting this guy (who is probably really sitting in his “nothing box”) to know what I want.
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The doctor said my baby could have down syndrome
A few weeks ago a phone call from my amazing OBYN turned my world upside down. She said that the blood tests, she had ordered, came back showing me as “high risk” for Down syndrome. My baby could have Down syndrome. My little Jonah boy had a 1 in 50 chance of being born with an intellectual impairment and/or physical abnormalities. She asked me to arrange an appointment to have diagnostic tests done so that we can know for sure. But I immediately knew that I was NOT interested in diagnostic tests. I did NOT want to “know for sure” if there was something wrong with my baby. There was just no room in my head for something like that. -
Give your family a “heart attack”
I love that February has been dubbed “relationship month”. I mean, if you’re not into Valentines Day and all the drama that goes with it, you are redeemed from the chocolates and red roses assault and can STILL enjoy the “month of love” by celebrating ALL the relationships in your life. It is with this in mind that I fell in love (pardon the pun) with the Valentines Day “Heart Attack” idea. Yep, I want you to give your family a “heart attack”. There, I said it.
This past Sunday, our wonderful Kingdom Kids children’s church at my home church, Word of Faith, sent home ziplock baggies filled with colorful paper hearts and the following instruction: “Starting Feb 1st, until Valentines Day, put a new heart on your kids door with a reason why you love them!”
I thought this was a brilliant idea for many reasons:
1. I am trying to develop a culture of speaking positivity and life over my kids. A “pick up your socks, why are you so lazy?!” speaking habit is such an easy trap to fall into. Our words have the power to build!
2. It IS the month of celebrating relationships anyways and why should that be limited to romantic partnerships? My children are important too!
3. It’s always a good time to let your children know why and how much you love them!
4. Let’s be honest, I’m not a craft mom and I probably never will be (because: lazy). This task seems easy enough and the reward is worth it!
If you’re looking to spoil your husband, you could do something similar (I would probably not stick it on our bedroom door though – I mean, who knows what these hearts could potentially say! If you know what I mean. *cough*). My brain wave is to have a romantic suggestion written behind, for him to cash in. A heart voucher, of sorts. How clever am I?Okay, I’m not really clever. Well, I am… but not in this instance. So, a big thank you to our wonderful Kingdom Kids leaders, for taking this fantastic initiative! (BTW they attribute it back to website Skip To My Lou.)
What will you be doing for your loved one/family this February?
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No shame in hand me downs
We are fortunate (it’s a weird thing to feel fortunate about) that we share our 2 older sons with their other parents. Together with these “other parents”, we are able to get school fees paid, clothes purchased and other basic necessities seen to, that we would generally have to pay for on our own. And yet, the boys still follow the “hand me down” tradition that my sister and I do (and I’m sure a bunch of you do too!) Albeit it doesn’t happen often (because they pretty much wear the same size clothing) but if Kyle’s shorts are too small, and they are in good condish, oh hey Seth here’s a cool shorts for you. And if my baby brother, Jason, has a hoody that doesn’t fit anymore, oh look Kyle, you score a hoody! And when Hubstopher’s favorite leather jacket made him look like Mr Bean, Jason scored a leather jacket! Doesn’t it work like that everywhere? I’m asking for a friend. This friend frequents these Pre-loved Clothing groups on Facebook, so she was a bit curious. -
Books that help you get rid of that stinking thinking
Is it December yet? No? It’s still January?! Boy, this year is just draaaagging by! But hey, this means that there’s optimal opportunity for us to get our growth on. This year, I’ve decided that I am going to work towards WINNING in every area of my life (remember, I ranted about it last week). And that means thriving on a mental level as well. My goal for January is to get rid of that stinking thinking by dropping crappy habits and picking up some really legit ones. Christian Art Media sent me a bunch of books that will help me do just that! And I’ve got a few to give away to you. But first, more about the books. -
2017: Winning! (Without a new year’s resolution)
Hey, here’s a pretty bold statement to make: I’m not a fan of new year’s resolutions.
Say whaaaa? Yes, really. While I appreciate that the start of a new year seems like a really good time to find purpose or make a change, guess what, you don’t have to start on the 1st of January. And, quite honestly, expecting an immediate change, after making a resolution (at any time of the year) is a bit of a long haul. What have I decided for this year though? Well, quite simply, 2017: Winning! Here’s what that means: -
Preggy update: Falling down stairs and ripped jeans
We all know that I am a very calm, unemotional, undramatic person, right? (Humor me) So you can imagine my surprise when I got all emo, after falling down a few stairs at work last week. Yes, baby is okay, and I’m okay too (thanks for asking) albeit a few bumps and bruises on my legs. But if you had asked me how I was on the day of the incident, I might have replied in a wail and a sob. I felt exceptionally sorry for myself and my bruises. And also, my near-new preggy jeans were busted! The only jeans that actually fits me right now, forever scarred by an ugly hole at the knee (See? I fell REALLY hard!). But then I reminded myself: 2017 is for WINNING! So I took my ripped jeans and ripped them some more! -
Boy or girl? Fun baby gender prediction tests that got it right!
One of the most exciting parts of expecting a baby is trying to guess what the gender is. If you Google everything and it’s cat (like I do) you may have come across a few crazy gender prediction tests. But do they actually work? Well, I thought to try out a bunch of them, when I was pregnant with Jonah Mark, to see which ones would get it right. I mean, I want you guys to make informed decisions, and (truth be told) I was actually pretty curious to see if there was truth to any of it too. Here are the fun baby gender prediction tests that we tried out:
It’s in the baby bump
Check out your belly in the mirror. Carrying low? It’s probably a boy. Carrying high? It’s a girl! I always thought that I was carrying pretty high. But, Jonah is a boy (duh) so the baby bump theory didn’t quite work out.Chips vs Sweeties
They say that girls are made of sugar and spice and all things nice. So if you’re craving sweet things, you’re most likely carrying a little girly! Craving salty or sour foods means that it’s a boy. With that said I eat enough cheesy hot chips to guarantee that our little bebe was a budding boy!What does the heart say
I’ve read articles that explain that a girl’s heart beat is faster than that of a boy. So next time you’re due for an ultrasound, make sure to check if the babes heartbeat is 140+ per minute. My babes heartbeat was 147, which should have been a clear indication that it’s a girl. A guess a bunch of factors could come into play with this one, but nah, it did not work for us.Chinese Birth Chart
The Chinese Birth Chart is an ancient method of calculating your baby’s gender by using your conception dates and other factors. Parenting.com has a version that you can try out over here. I did it and according to the Chinese, I was having a girl… which was inaccurate.Baby Centre
Well known baby and parenting website, Baby Centre, also has a ‘gender predictor’ and when I tried theirs out it said that it’s a boy! Give it a go over here. I mean, I’m not saying its the be-all of all gender predictor tests, but it was pretty interesting.Put a ring on it
This is a bit ‘hocus pocus’, but legend says that if you tie your wedding ring to a string, and hang it over your belly, the ring would bare all the answers! If it swings back and forth then it’s a girl. If it swings in a circle, it’s a little boy. I tried this and the ring “told” me that I am expecting a girl.Lesson learnt: gender prediction tests are fun but not always accurate, it turns out! Which gender prediction tests and activities do you recommend?
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Just so you know, this is why I blog
A few weeks ago I had coffee with a couple of bloggers at a local eatery. We chatted, very animatedly, about blogging and the blog industry. In mid convo I spotted two young ladies, sitting close by, mocking us openly. “Oooh she bloooogs!” I heard them jeer, judging us from a distance. It kinda pushed me over my chill limit. I mean, it’s not the first time that I hear a bunch of snotty comments being thrown at bloggers and social media influencers. But this time it was right there, all up in my grill, and it made me want to reconsider why I blog. Heck, why do it? What does this “blogging thing” even mean? -
2016 The recap
It’s a new year and a new season and I’m still tired. Okay, let’s scratch that. It’s no way to start my first blog post for 2017! How about: Hey friends! Happy new year! Okay, that sounds better. 2016 has been a pretty eventful year in the life of my spreadsheet brain. I thought that we should go over all the highs and lows of the year in a “2016 the recap” kind of style. Sounds like fun right? Here goes:
