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FIFA World Cup 2018 activities to do with your family
If soccer fever has hit your household, and you’re not keen to hide away in your bedroom for a whole month (oh is it just me then?), why not embrace the ball, yo. The soccer world cup is actually the perfect reason to schedule some fun, quality time with the ones you love. Looking for some cool things to do this soccer season? Well here are five FIFA World Cup 2018 activities to do with your family:
Pick your team
Get some friendly competition going by having a team “lucky draw”. Instead of root for the world cup faves, get them to lucky draw a team from a hat. Put up a wall chart to mark each team’s progress. You could give points for goals scored and even deduct points for fouls. I would probably do a redraw once the top 8 teams are revealed. (Hint: Put together a hamper of treats for the person with the most points at the end)Get kitted out
Get your family to represent their team by wearing country colors on game days. You could even get them to paint their faces and make flags and banners. Give points for best kit, paraphernalia and team spirit. Double points if they can sing their teams national anthem, complete from start to finish!Food always wins
Big game days are a great time to have “foods of the world” on your snack menu. Ask the kids to do some research and you could even get them to help you out in the kitchen as you prepare the dishes. Soccer World Cup party, anyone?Fun facts
Half time is a great time to have some soccer trivia. The internet is your friend, yo. Put together a couple of soccer world cup trivia questions and allocate points for each correct answer. This is a great way to keep the hype going.Visit a fan park
Find out where the world cup fan parks are located in your city and be sure to visit one, on a big game day. Ain’t nothing like the real thing, but the fun vibe at a genuine fan park is close enough! (Hint: day games are better, if you’re going with kids)So that’s on my list of things to do during this world cup season. Do you have anything special planned? Let me know which of these FIFA World Cup 2018 activities you’ll be doing with your family.
Image: Fifa World Cup website
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Creating criminals: How smartphone smart is your child?
I’m totally not hating on the fact that a tablet or cellphone screen can get my kids to leave me alone for a few minutes. I mean, come on, let’s be honest, we need our space (and a hot second to wash the dishes) right? And anyways, my 13 year old can’t get into much trouble online, right? Wrong. The truth is that the new generation of online sexual predator looks a lot like your kid. And as cool and trendy as social media is, you have to question whether it is creating a criminal right under your roof. (Perhaps one who is probably unaware of just how much trouble their actions can get them in.) Which brings me to this question: How smartphone smart is your child?
I sat through a very interesting talk by Social Media Law guru, Emma Sadleir (you may have heard her on 5FM yes) who shared that children has young as 11 years old are now sexting. With access to hardcore pornography (when the pop up banner innocently prompts “click here for fun”, guess what your 7 year old is going to do) our children are seeing things that are way beyond their maturity level and emotional capacity. And once the brain absorbs, it remembers.
Our kids are taking nude pics of themselves, you guys. Emma says that nudes are the latest currency amongst children (some as young as 9 years old) and these images are then sent through to friends and boyfriends/girlfriends under the guise that it will be deleted afterwards. What your little boy does not realize is that once it has been posted or sent, you can’t take it back! Kids are pretty savage now a days and if they find something amusing or shocking, the chances of it being kept under wraps is slim to none. Content follows your child. And guess what parents, it’s YOUR responsibility to make sure that they are aware of the permanence of the internet. Once its out, it’s out.
What we need to teach our children about the internet:
1. You are responsible for the content you create. And guess what, even if you like, retweet or share content, but did not create it, you are associating yourself with it and it can therefore be used against you in a court of law.
2. Sending and soliciting sexual images from an underaged child (even if you are underaged too) makes you a sexual predator! That’s right, it is illegal to get your buddy to send you a pic of his genitals as a joke. It is also illegal to share images of other people, in a compromised position, without their permission.
3. Your child’s school Code of Conduct applies to social media too, even if the images or content your child publishes does not have the school logo or name on it. In fact, the school can strip you of titles and even have you expelled, if they feel that you are bringing the school’s name to disrepute. Taking pics when you are doing something illegal or against the school’s code of conduct can be held against you.
4. Planning to go for a job interview one day? Your employer might Google you for your “online CV” – keep your social media profiles clean!
5. Bullying and cyberbulling is a criminal offence. Children over the age of 14 is considered to have full criminal capacity, in South Africa, which means they can receive jail time!
6. Make sure your location services are switched off! Never ever share sensitive information online!
7. If a friend or boyfriend/girlfriend asks for nudes you have the RIGHT to say NO. You don’t have to explain yourself to this person. If they refuse to accept no for an answer, tell someone.
8. If you are in a Whatsapp group where nudes or illegal behaviour is being shared, get out of the group immediately.
9. If you feel uncomfortable at any time, tell someone.
10. If you would not be comfortable sharing it on a huge billboard in the middle of the city, don’t share it on social media!There is so much to share on this topic. I will be continuing the conversation in a few days, but for now, please use this information to make sure that your child is cyber smart. The more you look after your child’s privacy, the more privacy they will have to look after.
Check out more about Emma on The Digital Law Co website.
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I was never ready to be a grandmother
Guys, I’m on the lighter side of 30 and so not ready to be anyone’s grandmother. Well, that’s what I discovered last week when my 16 year old came home, plopped a 2,5kg bundle of joy in my arms and declared “Congratulations! You’re an ouma!” I was never ready. I mean, seriously? A grandmother? Me? Firstly, no thank you, I’m too young. Secondly, no thank you, you’re too young! Thirdly, just no thank you. That is all.
After much debating, he politely let me know that it is in fact a school project, and even if he wanted to ditch the 2,5kg bag of flour (accurately dressed as a bouncing baby by his partner aka “babymama”) he couldn’t because he needed to pass his Life Orientation assignment.Anyways, I soon got over my feelings of animosity (mainly due to the fact that it’s actually a bag of flour and not a real baby) and we all found ourselves taking turns to hold the “baby” (who is oddly named Germaine for some reason) when Kyle had to go to the loo or wash the dishes. It was pretty awkward… and normal… in a weird way.
The initiative is part of the schools plight to teach students about teenage pregnancy and what it takes to raise a baby. He’s not allowed to leave Germaine without a babysitter. He has to feed Germaine and make sure “he” is clean and “comfortable”. Germaine can’t be left unattended and can’t be stuffed into a school bag. He must be treated like a real life baby and visitation times gets rationed between Kyle and his partner.
When asked how he feels about the project, he said that he already knows all about raising babies because he helps out with his baby brother and sister. It’s true though, he is an amazing big brother to his sibs! I sometimes joke around and call him our ‘deputy parent’. But he soon found out that having your own kid is not the same as helping out with your siblings. He had this to say about the flour baby project: “It doesn’t really affect me but it confirmed that I still only want to have a child when I am married.”
He says that the hardest thing about looking after Germaine is not forgetting the “baby” when he already has a bunch of other things to carry. I was like, yeah buddy, that’s life with kids! Having to juggle everything and still provide your offspring with attention and intentional care. Welcome to my world.He also says that sharing Germaine with his partner has made him realize that being a married parent is easier than being a single parent. “Single parenthood is tough!” He exclaimed. Followed by a “Mom, you’re a super mommy!” (referring to the first 12 years of his life, pre-Hubstopher, when it was just Kyle and I.)
As for me? Well, Germaine has taught me that I am not ready to be a grandmother. I have too much going on and even though we only help out when needed, this 2,5 kg bag of flour really slows me down. I blame it on the fact that I currently have two kiddies under the age of 4. They need to be grown first, before I can properly celebrate the idea of having grand babies. So let’s chill on the “grandmother” story, well atleast for a couple of more years, okay? -
What my kids are playing with: Transformers, Fantastic Gymnastics and Yo-kai
It’s almost the most wonderful time of the year and if you’re anything like me, you have your Christmas gifts list covered. Spreadsheet brain, remember? Christmas shopping for my kids is usually a mild affair anyways since they are all so very predictable. Kyle wants electronics. Seth loves to learn new things, and Karis… well, she’s a princess. If your kids are not as predictable as mine are, then this post is for you. My friends over at Hasbro is keeping us in the know, with all things toy-related, and sent me some information for moms and dads who leave toy stores with a “huh” expression on their faces. Some of my favorite picks, from Hasbro, for this year’s Christmas stockings, are: Transformers, Fantastic Gymnastics and Yo-kai.
Transformers
If you didn’t know (who evens are you), Transformers are human-like robots with the unique ability to turn into vehicles or beasts. I’m sure you knew that though. Right? With the newly released Transformers: The Last Knight movie, Hasbro has released a bunch of updated Transformer toys and regalia that is sure to make your little one squeal with delight on Christmas morning. Karis had a ball of a time transforming Optimus Prime (head honcho over at Transformers headquarters) from standing mode into truck. Considering the fact that the movie did really well in South Africa – ranking number 1 at the Box-office in South Africa during opening week – these toys are still pretty popular. Kids are also encouraged to #pledgeYourAllegiance and join #teamautobot to help Optimus Prime save the world by defeating the Decepticons or join #teamdecepticon and help Megatron take over the world. Choose your faction on www.morethanmeetstheeye.co.za
Fantastic Gymnastics
If you have a big family and are looking for fun group games, Fantastic Gymnastics is the perfect game for you! So basically the game requires players to flip the gymnast figure around the high bar, hitting release at the right moment to let him fly and try to stick the perfect landing. It’s super fun! You can play solo, head-to-head or challenge friends to a tournament. Get into the swing of things with this compelling and fun game, ideal for ages eight and up.
Yo-kai
If you’re down with having your kids stretch their imagination, then you should totally allow them to experience the world of Yo-kai with the Yo-kai Watch and Medals. Yep, I know that you know what a Yo-kai is because kids are going nuts over this children’s anime series based on the video game of the same name. So anyways, with the Yo-kai watch toy, children can imagine summoning Yo-kai characters, and when used with the medals, the Yo-kai watch plays sounds, music, and phrases. Insert one of the collectible medals displaying a Yo-kai into the watch to hear the character’s name, tribe song and more sounds.The latest board games and toys from Hasbro are available from Toys R Us, ToyZone, Toy Kingdom, Hamleys, Lilliputs and other major retailers. You can also shop online at Takealot.com
Disclaimer: All product mentioned above was sent to me by Hasbro, but the opinion in the post is entirely my own, I promise.
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Free The Smart Talk app helps to control your kids screen time
Have you guys heard of the The Smart Talk? It’s a really cool (free) interactive platform that provides tools for parents to set online security rules, for their kids. I mean, let’s face it, data safety and identity safety is a big deal right now (remember the time that I was catfished?) Have you considered the fact that you need to control your kids screen time?
We’ve been especially trusting when it comes to Kyle and his online activity. I mean, I don’t even really check his cellphone. And the thing is, no one wants to be the parent who launches into a full on FBI investigation when it comes to your kids electronic devices. It can be useful to keep a service like LifeLock (who partnered with National PTA to put together the Smart Talk site) running in the background incase your child’s online identity was compromised without you noticing. Oversharing has become the new norm (and I can say this, because you’re reading my blog right now, point and case). We should be talking to our kids about the potential dangers of social media and we should be monitoring their device usage. We need to be setting rules for our kids wrt screen time, what they are watching and who they are able to be in communication with.
And that’s why I really love the idea behind The Smart Talk platform. The website is really easy to navigate and creates opportunity for you and your child to determine what their online boundaries should be. Things like screen time (when is it allowed, and for how long etc), social media and even apps and which downloads are permissible, is taken into account.At the end of the little survey, you and your child enter into an official family agreement, that sets certain rules in place. The agreement is personalized and printable and you guys can sign on it, to make it official. Stick it up on on your fridge, as a friendly reminder, to help safe guard your kid against the perps of the online world, and hey, to empower them to be smart digital citizens.
What do you guys think about this? Have you set any boundaries in place wrt screen time? Drop your thoughts and pieces of advice in the comment section below.
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I get why it’s illegal for parents to spank their kids
It is the year 2017. A time where we keep our front doors locked, in the peak of summer. A time where it makes perfect sense to jump a red robot at 2am, because you never know who might rock up at your window. A time where we’re afraid to eat the chicken in case it has flu. And a time where it has become illegal for parents to spank their children.
Oh the shock! The horror! The outrage! We should be allowed to spank our kids! I hear you say. You’re right. I mean, why ban corporal punishment in the home? What does this even mean?!
Well, no, it does NOT mean that the Johannesburg High Court has decided to “keep up with the Kardashians” and is now feeling as if corporal punishment is like, soooo, not on trend at the moment. In case you didn’t know, the term “corporal punishment” basically refers to any punishment which uses physical force to bring about pain or discomfort. And alas, the percentage of parents who have severely injured their kids, under the guise of ‘giving a good spanking’ are just too high. Their lack of anger management means that the high court has to step in, in order to protect our kiddos.
So, as much as I agree that it sucks. (I mean, have you read my “angry mom” post? I like, SO, want to be able to give my kids a spanking without being charged for assault.) But let me remind you about the gross injustice so many of our young South Africans face, on a daily basis, at the hands of family members and parents who are suppose to care for them, and not hurt them.
This affects all of us and the way we raise our children. I mean, let’s be honest, a large percentage of us South African parents know when to draw the line between punishment and assault, when it comes to giving our kids a spanking. But unfortunately, the High Court has to stick up for the kids of the parents who kinda don’t.
So that’s where we are at, South Africa. Our children deserve better.
What are your thoughts on the new law?
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So what’s my role in my childs education?
As a parent you have the added benefit of being involved in your kids schooling. I’m using the word ‘benefit’ loosely… hey, don’t give me that look Margaret, I’m not a fan of homework. But I often wonder what my role is in my children’s education. Besides for paying exhorbitant amounts of school fees, that is. Am I meant to be helping my son build the Eiffel Tower out of matchsticks? (Seriously, who comes up with some of these assignments?!) And should I be checking his homework? How can I help my kids get the most out of their schooling? Here’s what a couple of clever people suggested:
Get to know his teachers
Teachers… meh. Kidding! Teachers are wonderful and, contrary to popular belief, often appreciate it when parents show more interest. If your kid is struggling with a subject, or if you’d like to find out how to help them excel in a particular area, chat to the subject teacher. Chances are you might score some study material out of them and tips that could give your kid an idea on how to prep for that exam or assignment.Do homework
I feel like this is a given, but also, I don’t waaaaant to. Having to deal with my kid’s homework is giving me second degree school nightmares. But parents, seriously, the simple act of checking up on them while they do after school work will create a sense of accountability and might even encourage the child to be more intentional with their homework. The aim of homework is to effectively help your child to practice what they’ve learnt in class. It should also point out areas that needs to be worked on. Use it, don’t use it. (Use it… you really should) A clever teacher once advised me that there is no such thing as “I don’t have homework”. There is always an opportunity for your child to practice what they’ve learnt during class that day.Step away from the assignments
I’m going to be real… I can’t not get involved with my kid’s school assignments! The OCD in me refuses to take a chair when Kyle comes home with class projects that require heavy detail and/or any form of designing or creating. Aaack! I mean, what does he know about making the solar system out of styrofoam? I can do it so much better, right? Except that if you don’t give your kid the centre stage in the crafting of his own assignments, he’ll never learn anything.Flash cards
If you’re committed to the cause, a great way to test your kid’s knowledge is by making use of flash cards to help them prep for tests and quizes. And hey, double your points by enlisting the child to design and create their own flash cards! It creates another opportunity for them to get the work into their heads. Getting them invested in the project, and even simply writing the work down, really helps with committing information to memory.Draw up study schedules
Kyle has only recently realized the benefit of having a well thought out study schedule. The study schedule can take into account the amount of days left to study, as well as the amount of work that must be consumed. Remember to pencil in revision time as well. I love using old exam papers to help Kyle revise. I often design my own practice test papers and set up a mock exam room for him. The practice test would normally look similar to previous exam papers, and it would be timed as well.Talk it out
I’ve found that my kid retains more knowledge if he understands and is geniunely interested in the subject at hand. With that said, I’ve tricked him into learning his work by simply engaging in a conversation about it. One year, he aced an exam based on Ancient Egypt, simply because it had become the topic of conversation during supper, for a whole week. #parenthack See? Parents are clever too.Do you have any cool/clever/easy tips to share with us wrt helping your kid get the most out of their schooling? What do you feel is a parents role during school years?
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Do you hold regular family meetings?
Does your family hold regular family meetings? You know, a gathering of sorts, where you are able to share your thoughts and feelings with each other? Yep, I get it, if you grew up in the *cough* 90’s like I did, a family meeting would be a foreign concept. In fact, it would be laughable! I mean, if we had family meetings back when I was a kid, my mum would respond to my “chores is child labor” claims with a shoe against my face. Well, that is a mild exaggeration, but you get the gist. Parents of the 90’s (and earlier) were not prone to needing the advice or opinion of their children. But things have changed, it seems.
So according to quite a few websites (I’m linking them below), it’s important to hold regular family meetings. These sites claim that families should sit down and deliberate decisions together… as a group. As in, your kid gets to have a say. One expert says that decisions should not be made without the kids consult. Apparently that’s dictatorship and no one wants to be that guy.
I read that holding meetings is a great way to include everyone in the decision making process and it creates a space where you can address issues, openly and calmly. Have you guys tried this at home? Well, I did, the other day. I mean, I figured that we arent living in 19-voetsak anymore and that it would be cool to hear the kids thoughts on certain things. Here’s how ours went down:
Winning
It was cool to address topics that were areas of concern. We brought up sensitive issues and made sure that everyone knew that we would respect each other’s opinion. Kyle (who loves debate) could argue his case and explain how he feels. And we could respond with our reasoning and thoughts on the topic. We then reached an amicable conclusion and were able to move on from the issue.Flopping
Did you read the part where I said that Kyle loves to debate? ‘Cause that. The kid can argue his point until next week, if given the chance. We had to remind him that this was a brainstorming session, and not an opportunity to attack each other. AND most importantly (well, for me probably), we get to have the final say because we are the big people.Conclusion
I think that family meetings are a great idea. But, before you hop right in there Harriet, lay down the law. Have some “family meeting rules” to comply with. In fact, a talking stick is also a really good idea too.Here are other bits of advice I found, that really helped us:
– Create a safe place (no judgies) for everyone to respectfully share their thoughts.
– What happens in Family Meeting, stays in Family meeting.
– For every negative comment, three positive comments must follow.
– Brainstorm ways to do things better, instead of focusing on the problem.
– Write down family goals and determine ways to reach them.
– Set the date for your next family meeting.So, that’s my take on the family meeting. What do you think, moms? Is this something that you’ve implemented in your own home? Please share your advice in the comment section below – you’ll be surprised at how many mama’s draw on the info that they receive in the comments.
Resources:
Centre for Parenting Education
Planning Alt
Lifestyle Plus Centre -
Are you an angry mom?
My children make me angry. There, I said it. Oh, sorry, your kids are perfect little poppets and you walk around sniffing roses whole day? That’s great. My children are not angels and I am a human being too, so I can’t relate. Look, I’m not saying that I live my life in permanent “angry mom” mode. Our home is not a war zone and I smile a lot more than I frown, I promise. But sometimes you need to bust out your inner ‘angry mom’ to get the job done. Are you an angry mom too?
When Angry Mom comes, she brings the thunder! Her voices changes and she even growls on occasion. You feel the thunder whether her answer is a cool “no.” or if she spends an hour explaining why you were wrong and what you should have done instead, using as many descriptive words as possible.
Yes, Angry Mom can come across as a tad bit irrational. Her ability to piece together coherent sentences completely overridden by the sheer disbelief of her child’s actions. “Shut your mouth when you’re talking to me!” followed by “answer me when I’m speaking!” or (my personal favorite) “The answer is no because I said so” regardless of the actual reason why the answer is no.Angry Mom is able to contort her face to make the most scariest facial expressions to correctly emphasize her anger. Flaring nostrils, glaring eyes and flushed cheeks blazing! If you are, what I’d like to call, “next level angry mom” (i.e. Angry Mom 2.0) you are able to control your Angry Mom face in public, giving your child a facial expression that says the things you are not able to say out loud… livid on the inside, polite smile on the outside. It’s a skill, really.
But jokes aside, I hate being Angry Mom. I feel like ‘angry mom’ overrides ‘fun mom’ and no one wants to be the uncool parent. I’ve been on both ends of the spectrum – super duper Angry Mom (cape, mask and all) and I’ve been really passive mom. And at the end of the day, I found that my kids actually want me to discipline them. If you read your ‘Parenting Gig’ contract, you’ll find the Angry Mom clause right at the bottom, in fine print. Yep, it is a requirement, to some degree. Disciplining your kid is a requirement. They need it – rely on it even – more than you know! Discipline shows that we care, allows them to learn and reiterates that we are in charge and we know what is best for them!And hey, remember that “discipline” does not mean “punishment”. Discipline is done out of love, to teach and grow. I always remind myself to be mindful of my words – they offer instruction and correction BUT they also have the power to tear down. So I guess what I’m trying to say is, be the Angry Mom, but like, the sober Batman version… don’t go Hulk on them. We don’t want to scar the children for life.
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Apparently teenagers turn into adults eventually
So my baby boy has just returned from his bi-annual visit to his dad in Cape Town and suddenly the kid looks more ‘man’ than ‘kid’. Not impressed. Not impressed at all. I don’t know what sorcery you Capetonians practice, but if you could return my baby boy to me in baby form next time, that would be great. Oh wait… I forgot, teenagers turn into adults, apparently. I believe it’s a condition that is most likely not reversible (unless you’re Benjamin Button, that is). So I guess I’m stuck with an ‘almost adult’ child.
