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The Journey Journal
Pregnancy and weddings have a couple of things in common. Well, for starters, they are flippen expensive. But that aside, I love the excitement of a new season and the expectancy of a new change on the horizon! And also, isn’t it amazing how you plan the “big day” for a couple of months and you literally sneeze and all those precious moments are finished. It is with this in mind that I started a journal while I was pregnant with our Curly. In fact, I began documenting every, single moment from the minute I found out I was pregnant. (spreadsheet brain, remember?).
I used it as a diary of sorts, to jot down my gynae visit dates and lists of things I would need to do as we began prepping for her arrival. I also wrote down my thoughts and daydreams, including photos, little stories, keepsakes that was special to me during this time. Before I knew it, the journal was filled with pages and pages of my heart, hopes and dreams, for my girl and a bunch of stuff, like advice and life lessons, that I would want to pass on to her one day. I plan to give the journal to her when she is 18 or 21 or on her wedding day, or something.
I recently had this revelation about her JOURNAL being a part of her JOURNEY. That’s what life is all about though, right? It’s all about the journey… the road you choose to take… the decisions you make, the memories you collect and the life lessons you learn and grow from! I want my girl to know that the journey of her life started when she was but a seed in my belly and that she was loved even then! I want her to know that God knew her name before she was in my womb and that she has purpose and every part of her life is special!Working with youngsters has shown me that there are so many who go through life believing that they are not as important as so-and-so OR not as pretty OR not as talented etc. The truth is that there are a lot of kids, out there, who simply lack the affection and love of a parent. We can blame it on social media or the Kardashians or heavy metal music but we really only have ourselves to blame. There is a lot more emphasis on living life a certain way and a lot less emphasis on the basics… quality time spent, words of affirmation, guidance and loyalty. We are rearing our kids in a hardhearted society where you get told that you have to be a certain way, in order to be deserving of love.
So yes, part of the reason why I started the journal was to share all these overlooked truths with her: You are enough. You are loved. You are perfect, just the way you are. But also, other significant things like the importance of being kind, loving those that other’s would deem ‘unlovable’ and acknowledging that every, single life is valuable and precious.
Ah if only more children could experience the kind of love that would help them to love themselves and OTHERS! What would our future look like, then? It is my prayer that my girl will grow into the kind of woman who knows what she wants and where she is going to! I want her to be a light in dark places and be a difference maker in her sphere of influence! I am so thankful that she is a part of my journey and so grateful to be a part of hers.
Mom, what sort of keepsakes and memorabilia have you set aside for your children?
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Booby love
One of the best things about being my daughters mommy is that I get to do something that no one else can – I get to feed her. Its so strange that there are so few who share my sentiments and I’ve had to explain my decision to breastfeed to a few more people than I’d care to explain myself to. It makes me wonder what on earth goes through the minds of sane human beings who look at me with “this girl is crazy” eyes when I mention that I love breastfeeding and I will do it for as long as baby girl needs me to. I mean, since when has processed, lab made milk been better than the milk that God had intended mommy’s to make for their baby’s? To each their own, I guess.
I think that the suckiest part of breastfeeding is the fact that I had to go back to work after 4 months and didn’t get to feed her as much as I wanted to. I did go through a few weeks of breast pump mayhem, but had to then start topping up with formula, since I was not pumping enough at work to send home for the next days feeds. She now gets about 3 formula bottles per day and then the rest of her feeds are mommy’s milk.I know that it would be easier to simply just give her the formula bottles and quit the breastfeeding (especially when I feel like I’m about to explode after a whole day of not feeding her and not pumping) but nothing beats the bond that we share after a long day of work and nanny!
So, for now, I’m okay with the accidental spills when I’ve failed to bring my breast pump to work. And I’m okay with looking like I’ve just went for DD cup breast enlargement surgery after 4pm each day. It’s all worth it in the end!
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How to be someones mom
In a weird way, I think that I rediscovered my “mom groove” after the birth of my baby girl. I’m calling it “weird” because I actually knew how to be someones mom before she was born. I mean, I was not completely foreign to the concept. My firstborn is in his teens, so I’m practically a pro! But rediscovering all the joy (and dedication) a newborn baby brings reminded me of the importance of being Mom. -
Changing my hairstyle one meal at a time
I have firm faith that 2015 will not end the way it began.
I mean, its so easy to ramble by, year after year, wearing your hair the same way, doing the same kinda things and being around the same kinda people.Not that all of this is bad all the time. I mean, some of the time, its kinda nice.But not this year… not for me.This is shocking because I hate change… which is why I’ve been wearing my hair the same way every year since the history of hair. So this is kind of a big deal.
Various pics of my (same) hairstyle spanning 2008 to present. I use to think I’ve got the whole Pocahontas hairstyle thing going, but yeah, its pretty much me doing absolutely nothing with my hair.Now, I’m not saying that I’m going on a huge hair cutting spree quite yet.I am slowly INCHING my way towards change. Just not the hair right now.But I am planning to do a whole bunch of other things different this year for the sake of growth and destiny and not being stagnant! I feel like there is soooo much happening in the spiritual realm and we kinda need to take steps of boldness to make it manifest in our lives.Some of the things I plan to work on this year (yep some are pretty deep but this one aint) is that I want to actually cook more than just the 10 or so dishes that are a favorite in our home.I’m not a terribly terrible cook, but I’m not exactly Nigella or Jamie.I guess what I’m trying to say is that, even though I actually own a cheese cutter – which is not a cheese grater, contrary to popular (my) belief – I don’t know the first thing about using it or why I would actually WANT to use it!Same goes for my herb cutter.Same goes for my whisker thingie.Same goes for my casserole cooker and ceramic serving dish.Yeah, it’s that bad.SO what I’ve done, in true excel-spreadsheet-brain style, is devise (i love that word….deviiiise) a list of recipes that are quite different to what I’d normally prepare for my guys.These are easy to make and look very interesting, oh and they are easy to make! (baby steps mmkay?)My spreadsheet has a list of each recipe and in a separate column, all the ingredients I’d need to make each recipe.So once I sort the column, I can then print a list of ingredients I’d need for a fun month of “Oh look I can make a casserole too”.I’m actually feel pretty chuffed that I am taking the first step towards doing something different in 2015.They say a change is as good as a holiday.Bring on the vacation!!!xxxL -
Jumpers anyone? My brain needs a kickstart…
Photo: Americas Morning Show Today marks 2 weeks before I return to work and I’m starting to feel a bit frazzled.
All of a sudden I can think up hundreds of things I need to get done before returning to my 8-5 job and I also really want to sleep as much as I can and lounge around in PJ’s but then I also really want to do stuff, like shopping, rearranging the house, breakfasts with my hubby, going on excursions…
So much to do, so little maternity leave time to do it.Being an adult is such hard work. It takes real commitment, if you want to do this thing right.
There are no short cuts (like studying for a test a few hours before)… everything requires proper planning and sensible thinking! Now with this said, I am aware that I take that notion to the umpteenth degree.
I cannot do anything without planning it properly, or else I feel totes out of control.
I think that’s the beauty of my marriage to my totally out of control husband! He doesn’t do anything pre-planned… he finds it really boring and tedious if he has to think about what hes going to do tomorrow instead of just waking up and doing it. I cant live like that.But I’ve found that since becoming his wife (it’s only been 1 year, 1 month and a couple of days ya’ll) I’ve found myself way more chillaxed!
I mean, I even left the house on spur of the moment wearing NO MAKEUP! Yep, it actually happened.
Today, I’m on my bed, laptop on my lap, baby asleep and guess what, I am not neat-freak-tidying the house. Feels good.
I’m on that “might wash my hair now, might wash it tomorrow” buzz and I’m a bit subconsciously afraid that its going to swallow me whole!I had a brief panic attack earlier, thinking about how I am going to manage to balance it all – going to work and coming home to a baby that will want to be with mommy, getting her bathed, cooking, homework with Kyle, cleaning up etc etc etc…
How do moms with toddlers AND infants do it?
How do moms with twins do it?
I’m starting to wish that I wasn’t so relaxed and had an action plan in place.2 weeks before normalcy returns and I am considering getting a full time maid.
Does this make me laaaaaazy? (yeah, I’m singing the song in my head too)
I don’t think that husbands understand the enormousness of our role!
There is no “down time”.
Oh to be a child again!Full time working, husband pleasing, Super Moms around the world – I salute you!
xxxL -
2015 – You’re about to get served!
Kicking butt preggy belly and all (Taken in 2014) Well, I take my metaphorical hat off to those ladies who have managed to hit puberty, found and lost their first love, found and left their first job, made an enemy, lost a good friend, got married, had a kid or two, found friends who you click with at this stage in your life, generally live the rest of your life loving and serving your family AND still find a way to be the same girl you were before it all happened.
I wouldn’t say that I have made a 360 degree change from being the dorky, read-a-holic, Mariah Carey loving, insecure, shy girl I was pre-baby number 1. But there are definitely bits and pieces that are no more and gobs of “new me” where there wasn’t before.
I always find it kinda corny when people say “stay as sweet as you are” and “never change!”
How is that possible? Life changes people and peoples lives change.
Character shaping events are all a part of the package of growth and hey, just being alive, I guess.
I mean, even if you don’t do anything remotely significant for a whole year, a part of you will still be affected… changed… subconsciously. The mere passing of time has the ability to shift things.With that said, I think that although we cant stop life from happening and time from going forward, we DO have the power to make right decisions. We can ultimately choose to learn from hard knocks and allow the tough stuff to mold us.
I have personally endured so much crap (for lack of a better word) and I intensely disliked every moment of it BUT I chose to take the lesson out of the situation.
Lets call life a party…. the lesson would be the swagbag.I’ve kinda been talking myself into being proactive this year.
2015 is going to be the year of a lot of things!
I do not want to be in the same place at the end of 2015. (I’m meaning physically, emotionally, spiritually – career, marriage, family etc).
I do not want to be in the same head space either.
If I cant look back at this year and think “wow, I’ve learnt some hard lessons in 2015” then bah humbug!Bring it on 2015!
I’m going to milk you for all that you’re worth!xxxL
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Im baaaack! Plus one!
Hello there!
By golly gosh, its been a long time since I’ve called myself a blogger!
I’m sure the 6 people who read this will be thrilled to have me back 🙂So I finally have another laptop, praise God, and I am actually on maternity leave, so time is in abundance.
Yes, I have a baby ya’ll!
She is the most beautifulest lil babe in all the land! No I’m not biased, shes just that perfect!
Karis Leigh was born on the 31st of October 2014 and she is absolutely darling, looking like her daddy (with more hair of course).I’m now in a situation where I cant fathom going back to work and leaving her at home for a whole day!
I think that pregnancy aches and giving birth aside, THIS part right here is the worst!
Whoever came up with these rules?! I don’t want to play anymore 🙁Something must be said about this amazingly torturous feeling of loving another little person so much that you cant see yourself separated from them.
Mind you, Hubstopher and I went out for supper the other night and my mom looked after Kari and hey, it was glorious to be amidst other adults (wearing make up and perfume nogals!)
But to leave early in the morning and only see her when its nearing dark is something else altogether.
Yes, I know… moms have been doing it for centuries and they’ve survived. Sigh. I know.Anyways, so apparently South African laws might change soon.
They’re talking about extending maternity leave to a nice 9 months!
When I first heard this I felt a bit cheated like, Uhhhm why couldn’t you bring about this law while I’M on maternity leave?! But on second thought I figured that I got it a bit easy because 9 months together and then a sudden split would surely cause even more anxiety for both me and baby.So in a way my 4 months at home is kinda the best thing because she wont be thaaaat scarred when mommy and her milk supply makes a disappearing act for 8 hours a day.
For emphasis on how difficult it is going to be to leave my darling lil babe, please see pic below.
Ciao!
xxxL
“Everybody come see how cute I am!” -
#100happydays
Hello Blog World! Yes, I am back and I am officially a wife!
Wedding talks will be underway as soon as I get my bearings but for now I want to share something equally (well not equally-equally, but its up there) exciting with you!100happydays is this mieu caliente concept where they get people to consider what makes them happy in their every days lives and document about it! I think its fantastic because in this day and age everyone grumbles and moans about all the negative stuff, but we have so much to be thankful for!
God is good to us. I mean, we’re alive, arent we?I want to share some more info with you straight from the horses (websites) mouth:
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We live in times when super-busy schedules have become something to boast about. While the speed of life increases, there is less and less time to enjoy the moment that you are in. The ability to appreciate the moment, the environment and yourself in it, isthe base for the bridge towards long term happiness of any human being.71% of people tried to complete this challenge, but failed quoting lack of time as the main reason. These people simpy did not have time to be happy. Do you?ow? Plain simple!every day submit a picture of what made you happy!It can be anything from a meet-up with a friend to a very tasty cake in the nearby coffee place, from a feeling of being at home after a hard day to a favor you didto a stranger.#100happyday challenge is for you – not for anyone else.It is not a happiness competition or a showing off contest. If you try to please / make others jealous via your pictures – you lose without even starting. Same goes for cheating.So first you register in the challenge then choose your favorite platform for submitting pictures. Here you can decide yourself on the privacy of your participation & happy moments.
-Share your picture via facebook, twitter or instagram with a public hashtag @100happydays
-Come up with your own hashtag to share your picutres with to limit publicity. (Dont forget to tell us how to find your pictures though
-Simply send your pictures to myhappyday (at) 100happydays.com to avoid any publicity
And you’re ready to go! 🙂People successfully completing the challenge claimed to:– Start noticing what makes them happy every day;– Be in a better mood every day;– Start receiving more compliments from other people;– Realize how lucky they are to have the life they have;– Become more optimistic;– Fall in love during the challenge.Even when the challenge is over the collected 100 happy moments can always remind you about the beauty of your life. For that, you can receive a little 100 page book with your 100 happy days at the finish line of the challenge!———————————————————————————————————————–And there you have it! 🙂 Cool concept, right?I dont know about you but I am blessed! And ‘ve got alot of happiness to share!Who knows my happy could inspire someone else to focus on the happy in their lives!Cant wait to get started!xxxL -
Tonsils are a conundrum
Hello there, and please accept my not-so-cleverly named post for all that its worth. It has been a rough couple of weeks!
Well, it all started last week… uhmmm last week? week before that? See! I don’t even know what year it is any more! Any ways, it started a while back when my lovely son came home with a head ache and sore throat, which then spontaneously combusted into a full on intense attack of tonsillitis. My baby boy had a fever that brought on hallucinations and nightmares… for him, not me. I even had to rush him to the hospital at one point! Not nice. He missed 4 whole days of school and stayed in bed over an entire weekend. When he was finally better, I breathed a sigh of relief…. but not for long.
The next Thursday, I felt a little ummm qualm in the back of my throat, and chose to ignore it. By the time Thursday night arrived, I realized that the qualm had mutated into one of those giant ogres that you find in…. (okay I was going to reference a movie here, but I don’t watch movies any more)…. just trust me, it was really big okay! I had like these, cold shivers… literally freezing down to the core of my core! Any ways, the doctor said that I have tonsillitis and that I had picked it up from my son! Who knew it could be contagious?! Shocking. Doctor says that tonsils actually play a particularly important role in your body… I think it protects your throat or something. So he isn’t to keen on getting them removed. Go figure.
Any ways, that was on Friday. Its Monday today, and I am still not eating properly, I have crazy dizzy spells and my throat feels as if someone shoved a sock down into it.
I need this feeling to end like, right NOW, please. And thank you.
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Pushing out into deep water
I must admit, I have been terrible at blogging recently… but that’s mainly because of server/internet problems.
Life has been so melancholy recently. I don’t know… there is something about human beings and not getting your way that kinda doesn’t gel 🙂
On Monday at Family Group, they prayed over me and God spoke to me.
He basically said, HELOOOOOO!! I am still God!!!!! Just wait on me!!!!!My friend, Aneesa, gave me Luke 5:1-7 (see below) which speaks about the time when Jesus told the disciples to put their nets into deep waters. They were a bit sceptic since they had been attempting to catch fish (to no avail) whole day. But they did as he instructed and soon drew their nets up and it was full of fish!
I think that God is saying: Even though it looks impossible and depressing and negative and melancholy 🙂 in reality, when I am in the boat with you, your nets are never really empty!
So today, I dare you to ignore what REALITY says, and stand on what God says.
Put aside what the doctor and the bank and circumstance and LOGIC is telling you and put your trust in the Word of God.I dare you to push out into the deep and still waters of who He is… right into the midst where the impossible can happen! That’s where He does His BEST work!
I dare you!!!!!!
Luke 5
5 1-3 Once when he was standing on the shore of Lake Gennesaret, the crowd was pushing in on him to better hear the Word of God. He noticed two boats tied up. The fishermen had just left them and were out scrubbing their nets. He climbed into the boat that was Simon’s and asked him to put out a little from the shore. Sitting there, using the boat for a pulpit, he taught the crowd.4 When he finished teaching, he said to Simon, “Push out into deep water and let your nets out for a catch.”5-7 Simon said, “Master, we’ve been fishing hard all night and haven’t caught even a minnow. But if you say so, I’ll let out the nets.” It was no sooner said than done—a huge haul of fish, straining the nets past capacity. They waved to their partners in the other boat to come help them. They filled both boats, nearly swamping them with the catch.8-10 Simon Peter, when he saw it, fell to his knees before Jesus. “Master, leave. I’m a sinner and can’t handle this holiness. Leave me to myself.” When they pulled in that catch of fish, awe overwhelmed Simon and everyone with him. It was the same with James and John, Zebedee’s sons, coworkers with Simon.10-11 Jesus said to Simon, “There is nothing to fear. From now on you’ll be fishing for men and women.” They pulled their boats up on the beach, left them, nets and all, and followed him.
